So, how does it feel to get fired?

Anybody a fan of the movie Big?  I love it when Tom Hanks sings “Feelings, nothing more than feelings …” to his mom to prove that he is really her missing little boy.

So, how does it feel to get fired?  Simple – it sucks.  It’s like getting punched in the stomach. Even when you know it’s coming it is an awful feeling.  I’ve been blindsided a couple of times. The boss calls you in.  You think everything is going great.  Then she says, “I’m sorry but we’ve decided to make a change.  We’re eliminating your position.  Your last day will be …”

You don’t really hear much after that. Your head starts to swim.  You feel a little nauseated.  Depending on how quickly you move through the stages of grief you may get angry. You may try to plead.  Your fight-or-flight instincts kick in and you just want to get the heck out of there.

You’re probably reading this because you’ve already been fired and know what I’m talking about. If so, then you may be wondering why I’m wasting your time recalling bad memories.

Here’s why.  You need to remember what that feels like.  I don’t know if you got fired yesterday, last week, or 10 years ago, but look at where you are today.  You’re alive.  The world continues to revolve, the sun rises and sets.  Life goes on, and no matter how badly you felt when that happened, you survived. 

It might have been difficult to talk about – maybe it still is.  It’s always hard to tell your family – believe me I know that – but you’ll go on.  Follow this blog. Read the book.  Build a network. There are people who can and will help you.

Now let’s get busy and find you that next job. If you are struggling with your job search, this might help https://im-fired.com/about-the-book/.


Feeling Older?

I’ll just come out and say it, age discrimination in employment is real.  If you are over 50, you will have a more difficult time finding a job.  Sometimes it’s blatant and sometimes is subtle, but more likely it is completely unintentional. Full disclosure, I’m over 60 and I know what I’m talking about.

As a general rule, the longer your career, the more you know, the more varied experiences you’ve had, and that should mean that you are more prepared to solve complex problems, will require less training, and will likely be a more loyal employee. But, it also might mean that you command a higher salary and a larger title.

The other thing that sometimes comes with experience is a set of bad habits and a resistance to change. You learned how to do this task 20 years ago, you certainly don’t need some young pup (your new boss) telling you to do it differently. That’s called being a curmudgeon and is rarely a good thing in the workplace (or anywhere else).  Finally, younger workers typically have more recently been in school, are often more open to learning, know the current trends/techniques, and tend to be more comfortable with both technology and change. 

These are all generalizations, but in reality, most hiring managers are using generalizations and assumptions. That’s all they have. So, they think they are picking the person they believe will help their organization the most. 

To counter that, you need to be prepared to come out swinging.  Talk about your experience AND your flexibility.  Talk about your knowledge AND your ability to learn. Demonstrate your familiarity with current trends and technology.

If you are over 50 and a curmudgeon, you will face age discrimination, and maybe you deserve it.  But if you are over 50, and have continued to learn new skills, kept current in your field, and are open to change; well now you are a clearly better hire than those young whippersnappers that are still wet behind the ears. Don’t be a victim of age discrimination. Fight back by keeping yourself current, flexible, and open to learning and change.  If you are struggling, this might help:  https://im-fired.com/about-the-book/


New Years: Remembrances and Resolutions – Part 2

Yesterday we talked about remembering 2015.  I hope you did that and celebrated how far you’ve come in life.

Okay, now spin your chair around 180° and let’s look into the future.  What does 2016 hold and how are we going to be prepared for it?  Inc.  Magazine asked people what they wanted to accomplish in 2016.  The number one answer was to enjoy life to the fullest (read the full list here).  Your resolution might be to find a job -not just any job – the right job.

If finding that new, better job is one of your resolutions, allow me to make a few suggestions to increase your likelihood of success.

Make a plan – Regardless of what your resolution is, there are three things you can do that will help you live it: 1) write it down, 2) include milestone dates and measures, and 3) make it public.  For your job search, set goals for how many people you are going to network with each week, how many emails and phone calls you will need to set up those networking meetings, how many new companies you will to research, etc.  Remember, looking for a job should be a full time job.  Make a plan that uses 8 hours a day – productively – two finding that best job then share that plan with a few key supporters – maybe even post it on Facebook.

Network – I can almost guarantee that you will not get that next BEST job, unless you network.  My suggestion is that each week you meet 5-10 people you have never met before, tell them your story, and ask for their help.  You will be amazed and what happens.

Be prepared – Every time you go to a meeting or an interview, be prepared.  Have your polished resume and target list with you.  Know as much as you can about who you will be talking to and the job/company you are interviewing for.  Be sure to have and practiced (aloud) your answers to common interview questions.

Be thankful – Say thank you – send thank-you notes – let people know how much you appreciate their time, their energy, their encouragement.  Even when you don’t think they were very helpful, thank them.

Be persistent – The economy is rebounding.  There are more jobs available, but I still tell people to plan for their search to take one month for every $10,000 in annual salary they hope to earn.  A $50k job might take 5 months to find.  Not any $50k job – but the right $50k job for you.  Plan the work, and work the plan.

If you are reading this blog thinking “but I don’t know how to do these things,” then you’ve come to the right place.  Search this blogs for tips on all of these subjects.  Or, buy the book (see below).  Or read someone else’s book or blog.  The help is there – the jobs are there – we just need to get you connected with one of them.

Speaking of resolutions – I resolve to help you find that next-best job in 2016.  Happy New Year!

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another.  Now available in both print and eBook formats!  Click here for more details.


New Years: Remembrances and Resolutions – Part 1

Looking back – wow!  Its hard to believe that 2015 is over.  I encourage you to take a few minutes and reflect on this year – the good and the bad.  For me, this was a good year professionally.  It was a good year educationally as I’ve finished my coursework and begun working on my PhD dissertation.  I can celebrate having a wonderful and supportive family.  That family celebrated the life of my father who passed away in May.  My respect for him and the impact he made on so many people’s lives continues to grow.  Editorially, I’m Fired came out in print and for the second consecutive year over 1,000 people visited the website.  If you are one of those people, thank you.  I can confidently say I am a fortunate man.

So, how about you?  If you’re reading this blog it is likely that you are a job seeker.  Maybe that’s a good thing, maybe not, but there is more to your life than your job.  Use this opportunity to take it all in, and appreciate what you have, and make time to let others know that you appreciate what they mean to you.  If you are in job search, reflect back on what you know and what you’ve learned.  You will need a good sense of where you came from before you can clarify where you want to go.

Take time today, before the celebrations tonight, to look back on 2015.  Enjoy your successes, remember those who you lost, accept what you have, and know that you are not alone.  One of my favorite poems is Desiderata by Max Ehrmann, and I encourage you to read it.  When I was in college, the Dean of Men had poster-sized version on the wall behind his desk and he would regularly recite it to young men who were struggling.  The final lines are:

“and whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.  With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.  Be careful.  Strive to be happy.”

Happy New Year!  Come back tomorrow and we’ll talk about resolutions.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another.  Now available in both print and eBook formats!  Click here for more details.


Welcome to … The Holiday Zone (redux)

This is an update to a previous post        

For those of you old enough to remember this – imagine some twinkling music in the background and Rod Serling’s voice saying …

“Job seeker, you’ve noticed something has changed – there are fewer openings – no one returns your calls – everyone seems distracted. It’s because you have entered —— the Holiday Zone.”

I don’t have any factual data to back up what I’m about out to tell you, but I do have 30 years of experience. The period between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day is a frustrating time to be a job seeker. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but it is reality.

From an organization’s perspective, this is not the time to try to fill a job. They know that people who have jobs, stop looking for new jobs during the holidays. They likely have spent their recruiting budget, and they wont’ be buying any new advertising or creating any new jobs until after the first of the year. Everything slows down until January.

The same is true for the employed job seeker. They will spend their weekends and evenings shopping, wrapping, and attending holiday parties, not looking for jobs.

So, if you are unemployed, what do you do? Just put your search on the shelf for a month? No, you keep working, but you work smart.

Use holiday parties as networking activities. Meet new people, tell them your story, and ask if you can connect after the first of the year to exchange information and contacts.

Take this time to do some more intensive corporate research. Look at the local news websites to find which companies are in the news for charitable giving or other social outreach; then add them to your Target list and make plans to contact them in January – and when you do, mention how you support their good works.

Volunteer to work for a community organization that helps families over the holidays and do some networking with other volunteers. If you do schedule a networking meeting, take a few holiday cookies as a thank you gift.

Spend some time on your resume, maybe it is time for a complete resume makeover; reorganize, rewrite, and refresh.

The point is, you can’t control the calendar, you can only control how you respond to it. You can curl up in a ball and wait for January, or you can spend your time productively. You won’t see as many postings, you won’t get as many interview, and people won’t be as available to network; but that does not mean you can’t keep looking and making yourself better so that come January, you are ready to knock their socks off.

Enjoy the season, recognize your blessings, and get ready for a fantastic 2016.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another. Now available as in both print and eBook formats! Click here for more details.


Attention Holiday Shoppers!

Just in time for your holiday shopping, I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another is now available in print! Whether your company calls it a layoff, a termination, or a reduction in force, the bottom line is that you are out of a job and need to find a new one. So how do you do that? There are no easy answers or quick fixes, but there are some straightforward techniques that in the end may mean you don’t just find a job, but you build a career.

Buy the book here for a great stocking suffer for the job seeker in your life. Or, if you prefer the ebook, buy the Nook version at Barnes & Noble (also available in other formats from Smashwords).  If you want advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out the I’m Fired?!? blog.

Happy Holidays!


Anticipation Redux

(This is an update to a post from August, 2014.)

What are your great memories of anticipation? Trying to go to sleep on Christmas Eve? The last day of school? The last day before school started? How about right before you got married?

Now think again about some of those times. Mixed with that excitement, was there also a touch of fear, or a note of doubt. You were sure that whatever was going to happen was going to be great – or at least you were pretty sure – right?

Your job search will probably be filled these times. Maybe you’re a finalist for job, going in for your last interview. It would be great to get back to work, this sounds a like a good place to work, the people have been very nice, but … the work seemed a little tedious – not exactly what you’d like to do. What if you take the job and it starts off great, but after a few weeks the newness wears off and now it’s just a job. Did you make a mistake? Should you keep looking?

Recently a friend of mine had a similar “problem.” He was getting ready to interview for two jobs. He was more interested in Job A than Job B, but both were better than his current job. He had sleepless nights trying to figure out what to do if Job B made him an offer before Job A did.

Here’s the deal, you need to control what you can control – and that is you. Rather than stress before (or during) the interview about what you’ll do if they do (or don’t) offer you a job, be in the moment. Put 100% of yourself into the process and wait to see what happens. If you are in a new job and feeling a bit of buyer’s remorse – set it aside and do your job the best you can do it.  If, after you’ve tried it you decide you made a mistake, look for a new job.

I heard the phrase once that worrying was “borrowing trouble” – taking tomorrow’s problems and making them issues in your life today. As best you can, don’t do that. Live in the present, do what you can to be successful today, and let tomorrow take care of itself. Take it from a guy who’s lost his job six times. Things work out. Control what you can control and let the rest take care of itself.

BTW – Here is some real life anticipation. In 1998, I had an idea for a book and started writing. In 2015 I’m Fired?!? was published as an eBook. Last week I held a proof of the paper version in my hands and it should be available in about a month. Sometimes you just have to learn to be patient.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another. Available as an eBook and soon in print! Click here for more details.


I Want You To Want Me

In 1977 the band Cheap Trick first sang:

I want you to want me
I need you to need me
I’d love you to love me
I’m begging you to beg me
I want you to want me

While this is a great classic-rock song, it should not be your mantra as a job seeker.

Too many times, I have talked with a candidate and I could hear the desperation in their voice. They really wanted me to offer them this job. Maybe it was the perfect job for them. Maybe it was an okay job that they though could grow into something better. Maybe they had just been out of work too long and were ready for anything. I don’t know, but their desperation did not help get them the job.

Success in job search, as in much of business life, is about self-confidence. As Max Ehrmann wrote in Desiderata, “You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.”

If you are reading this blog, it is likely you are involved in a job search. Please remember that you are a unique individual, who is not defined by your job or your employment status. If you don’t get this, you’ll get the next one. I understand the financial need to be employed. I understand the emotional needs to be connected to an organization and to find value in working and providing.

You may really want this job, or you may really need this job. But you need to make sure that as you interview, the interviewer hears a calm, professional voice that tells them why you are the best candidate they will find for this job, and not a voice that sounds like three-year old who really, really, really wants another scoop of ice cream.

Believe in yourself. Work hard. The next job won’t be too far away.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another. Available soon in print! Click here for more details.


The Four Agreements for Job Search

Don Miguel Ruiz has written a very powerful book called “The Four Agreements.” First published in 1997, the book lays out four agreements that you can make with yourself that will change the way you see the world and interact with others. To be completely honest there is a spiritual side of the book that’s simply not for me, but I love the practical applications of the four agreements and I try to live by them every day. I also think that making these four agreements can be very powerful in your job search. Here is how I would interpret and apply the agreements.

1)  Be Impeccable in your word

You words are powerful – they influence you and those who hear them. Only speak positively about yourself and others. Only speak the truth. Avoid gossip and speculation. In networking and job interviews don’t oversell yourself and suggest that your skills or experience are greater than they are, but at the same time don’t undersell. Skills are transferable, you can learn and grow, so even if you don’t have the exact experience they are seeking, show them how you can compensate and learn. Say exactly what you mean.

2)  Don’t take anything personally

Job search can be brutal. There will be jobs that you want, but are offered to others. People will be rude to you. Doors will be closed to you. Take a step back and realize two things. First, hiring managers are trying to do what they think is best for their business. If you are a finalist for a job and they offer the job to someone else, that decision is not because you are a bad person; it is because they felt the other person was a better fit. You wouldn’t have been a finalist if they didn’t think you could do the job. It’s not personal, it was their business decision. And second, take some satisfaction that sometimes they make mistakes – it’s their loss, someone else will get to work with you.

3)  Don’t make assumptions

If you have a question, ask it. Don’t assume others know what you know or feel the same way about an issue. Don’t assume they know you are very interested in the job. Don’t assume they know you are interested in relocating. Don’t assume the job comes with health benefits. Bottom line – don’t assume. Ask questions – share information – try to make sure that everyone is crystal clear on the important parts of the job and about you.

4)  Always do your best

At the end of the day that’s all you’ve got. They talk about athletes leaving it all on the court. If you’ve done your best, given it everything you have, followed the other three agreements and don’t get the job, then go after the next one. You can’t beat yourself up if you’ve done your best. On the other hand, if you’ve cut corners, we not quite honest (with the recruiter or yourself), and tried to wing-it during the interview, think about it – would you want to hire someone like that?

These are four hard things to do. They are hard in life, and they are hard in job search. But, I guarantee that if you make these four agreements part of your core values, you will be successful in more than just your job search. I encourage you to read the book and understand Ruiz’s full message, but more than that, I encourage you to embrace these four agreements.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to network, or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another. Available soon in print! Click here for more details.


The Bottom Line

(This an updated combination of two posts from late 2013)

Shakespeare said, “A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet.” Does the same sentiment apply to losing your job?  Here are a few words and phrases that I’ve heard over the years that all basically mean the same thing:  terminated, fired, made available to industry, sacked, canned, separated, exploring other business interests, discharged, axed, RIFed, laid off, whacked, given the opportunity to be successful elsewhere, dismissed, and let go.  Did I miss any?

There are subtle differences between some of these words but otherwise they are all variations on a theme with different levels of sensitivity or compassion mixed in.  As you might have been able to tell, I’m compassionate, but I’m not an overly sensitive guy.

The bottom line is that for whatever reason; you don’t work here anymore.  It’s time to move on, start networking and find out where you are going to work next.  That may be easier said than done, but what’s the alternative, sleep on your mother’s couch?

In 1969 Elisabeth Kubler-Ross published a book called On Death and Dying that changed the way that we looked at the grieving process. Kubler-Ross identified five stages in the grieving process that, with some perspective, can be applied to being fired.

  1. Denial – No, there must be some mistake – they can’t fire me I’m a good person and a hard worker.
  2. Anger – It’s not fair! I do way more work than Joe, fire him! This is discrimination!
  3. Bargaining – There has to be another way. How about if I take a cut in pay? Could I work part-time for a while? Maybe if I get some more training?
  4. Depression – Whatever – I’ve seen this coming – there is nothing I could have done – I probably deserved it – I should have left when Bob quit.
  5. Acceptance – Okay, what’s done is done – time to move on and find that next job.

The deal is, that you will not be effective in looking for a new job until you get to stage five. While this may sound harsh, you just need to get over it and move on. You might have been discriminated against; there might have been a chance for you to take a cut in pay; maybe there was a mistake; but at the end of it all, you’re sitting at home on the couch watching Judge Judy when you should be out looking for a new job. No pitty-party, no woe-is-me; it is time to get up, brush off your resume, start networking, and get to it.

Looking for a new job is a full time job. If you let your anger at your former employer come out in your interviews, no one is going to hire you. If you pout and whine during a networking meeting, no one is going to refer you to their contacts. If you can’t get off the couch and make some phone calls, your network isn’t going to grow.

It’s hard, but it’s life. I’ve been there. I’ve seen lots of other people and I am confident that you can too. Now get up, get to work, and let’s find that next job.

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If you want more advice on how to write a resume, how to, network or just how to find a job, check out I’m Fired?!? A Business Fable about the Challenges of Losing One Job and Finding Another. Click here for more details.